Friday, October 26, 2007

The elusive butterfly of yeast-part 1

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I am a biomedical slacker. I didn't always used to be, I used to be really neurotic about it. I got kind of burnt out on the whole magilla, but somehow after reading Jenny McCarthy's book,I kind of got sucked into the vortex. But only halfway this time. I promise.
When bubs first got dx, or even before, I was online constantly looking up everything. In my attempt to convince myself that I had control over the situation I stumbled upon the D.A.N.!protocol. Don't even think about leaving off that exclamation point! So I dragged my son to the closest D.A.N.! doc I could find (we shall call him Dr.Well from now on). I plunked down enormous sums of cash and I agreed to do whatever he told me to do. We went casein free first, we went gluten free shortly after. It was relatively easy though given that bubs was 18 mo and didn't talk. He wasn't that much of a fan of solid foods at that point either. I had to go to dr. well every two weeks. It seemed like every time I went, he added another task to my list, the pressure just built each time I went there. I remember one time bubs had an ear infection and I almost went into apoplexy at the pediatricians office when they wrote out a rx for antibiotics. Dr.Well told me not to. I was torn. I didn't want bubs to be in pain, and I didn't want to screw up his gut. So I dragged my poor bubs to the other end of the island for a quick hocus pocus session with dr.well. It was a huge huge leap of faith, but whatever the hell he did, it seemed to help bubs and he survived, miraculously, so did I. Ok, I am veering off course here. The reason I am a biomed slacker is because it all just got way too much for my fragile neurotic mind to handle. Every time my son spinned a wheel or looked at something funny, I blamed myself. It was the lollipop he ate two days ago-yeast! Or that I couldn't follow the virtual caveman diet they told me to follow, basically nuts and twigs and boiled chicken. I just couldn't do it well enough. I couldn't make the young coconut kefir (even though I tried about 6 times). My son wouldn't eat broccoli. Oh, if he would only eat some fresh cultured veggies (sour kraut times ten!) then he would talk. I felt like no matter what I did, I wasn't doing it well enough. I did it for over two years. We schlepped coolers of food wherever we went, I made my own chicken nuggets, and crazy concoctions that my sister made fun of.

I thought yeast was at the root of all of our problems. If I could only get rid of the yeast. If you do any delving or dabbling into the biomed world, eventually you will come across the yeast issue. There are tests for it, expensive, kind of not sure about the validity type tests. But it's safe to assume in the biomed world that any kind of stimming, sleep issues, ocd behavior, skin issues, can be blamed on that yeasty beast. To treat it? Not that easy. It involves a variety of concoctions that kill the yeast causing die off, the herxheimer effect if you really want to get scientific. Die off isn't a pretty thing, but it's supposed to be good because after a week or so of hell you are supposed to be rewarded with a new and improved child. Of course this sounds sarcastic, but there's probably a bit of rationalizing going on inside my crowded head. The truth is, I don't know what works. I don't really know. No one does. It just involves a lot of blind leaps of faith. Even though I thought I was done chasing the yeast beast, I have been slowly but surely getting sucked back into the matrix. I have my threelac, I have my probiotics, have the caprylic acid- I even have the lauricidin. I am out to hunt down and annihilate that vague yeast monster. Even though I am not sure whether or not it's out there.

I just wanted to add as a caveat (my new favorite word) that my own biomed obsessions probably have very little to do with my child. I managed to live around 37 years on this earth under the illusion that I had control over my life, silly girl that I was. When bubs was dx, I was terrified and felt like I had to do something to help him. My goal wasn't to turn him into a science experiment, or change the core of his already wonderful being. I just wanted him to talk.
I've eased up big time since then, but I think I am getting nervous for him with kindergarten looming around the corner. I hope this post isn't to verbose- it's lookin a little wordy.

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