Sunday, August 31, 2008

Cottage Industry

So while I haven't been able to get much sewing done this summer, I have certainly thought a lot about it. I am going to have my first 'vendor' experience though. I saw in the local pennysaver that a school in my area was having a fundraiser. It's a different autism school from the one that bubs attended, but I figured my first foray into craft selling might be a little easier if I was around my autism peeps. My sister is going to sell her jewelry too, she purchased a table as well. Even if I don't sell anything, it will all be for a good cause. It will be on October 2nd.

I really wanted to do it, not so much to make money because I am learning that it's somewhat impossible to make any doing this. When you purchase materials retail and then spend hours sewing them yourself, it's not really to get rich. For that you need lead paint and sweat shops, I think. For the most part I am doing it for the thrill, for the joy of making things and the even greater joy of people wanting to pay hard earned monies for the stuff I make. So I sent in my check. Then I started to freak out. I have been squeezing in a little creating time as of late and my inner voices are pretty harsh. I find it best to just keep plugging along and trying my best. Then I must leave the projects in the room and go and do something else. When I come back things look better as if little elves came and cut away all the loose threads. Hey, it's not brain surgery and it's not really a big deal if no one buys any of it (although it would be cool if they did). Worse case scenario is that I have a store room of ready made (with love) gifts.

I am excited though. I remember as a little girl I would always try and make stuff to sell to stores. When I was really young I made little miniature food out of clay and I sold them to a local dollhouse store. When I was in high school, I created these little tchotzkes called 'uncannies' where in I took a crushed soda can and painted it to look like a person. I made cheerleaders and football players and I got a local gift store to buy a few. I once went to someones birthday party in high school and someone got them one of my cans as a present. So the entrepreneurial spirit is part of my being. It's more of a 'you like me, you really like me' kind of thing, as opposed to a 'money money give me money' kind of gig.

Maybe it's part of me trying to get my mojo back. I am going to be going back to teaching in some form or another, but this adventure is different. It could be filed under 'personal growth' maybe? I don't know. All I know is right now I have not much to sell and as soon as that bus pulls away on Thursday morning, I will be sewing away like a madwoman. Inventory. I need inventory....

I dabbled in matryoshka dolls. They are very in on the etsy scene. They along with toadstools, gnomes and hedgehogs are the trend for crafty gals. I thought they looked like bowling pin dolls, but I was pleasantly surprised when my husband saw them and said 'they look like those Russian nesting dolls'. So they passed the first test. I haven't decided what the second test will be yet.

This is a little kidlet tote that I made for bubs' friend's graduation party. I thought it came out cute, although it does have it's issues but it was a gift and gifts don't have to be perfect. They are made with love. And love doesn't care if your seams are wonky and your handle was too long and needed to be chopped and sewn back together.

So this is where I am at these days. Maybe I will be so busy sewing that I will forget to eat. Wouldn't that be lovely?

Friday, August 29, 2008

I'm a winner...

The lovely Rae at Not Perfect Parenting has bestowed upon me this lovely award. I believe the rules involve answering these questions with one word answers and then giving the award to seven more people. I am afraid I don't know seven more people I could send this to without them going 'who the hell is this person'. I am a bit insecure these days in case you haven't noticed. I could not possibly deal with rejection at this time. Plus my computer has some issues and it would take me ten years to try and link everyone. But thank you for my award, I am needy and I love the attention.

1. Where is your cell phone? bag
2. Where is your significant other? couch
3. Your hair color? highlightedish
4. Your mother? nice
5. Your father? retired
6. Your favorite thing? reading
7. Your dream last night? unmemorable
8. Your dream/goal? unfatness
9. The room you're in? den
10. Your hobby? sewing
11. Your fear? death
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? happy
13. Where were you last night? home
14. What you're not? skinny
15. One of your wish-list items? couch
16. Where you grew up? LongIsland
17. The last thing you did? cooked
18. What are you wearing? stilettos
*kidding, sweats
19. Your TV? modest
20. Your pet? fish
21. Your computer? Lifeline (ditto Rae)
22. Your mood? pooped
23. Missing someone? no
24. Your car? new
25. Something you're not wearing? makeup
26. Favorite store? joannefabric
27. Your summer?magical ;)
28. Love someone? yup
29. Your favorite color? red
30. When is the last time you laughed? today

31. Last time you cried? today

I don't know why 31 is acting all wonky but it will not behave. So it's by itself. At any rate, I did remember that there is someone out there who I can pass on the props to- it's Momster!

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Warning signs

Here's another embarrassing story that I wouldn't admit to if you were to meet me in person. I was online checking out my cell phone bill. I just got a new 'free phone' and my bill seemed a little high, so I was just doing some investigating. I was looking at the phone calls for my husbands line and I notice this phone number. The number appears over and over again on the bill for the month. I can't place it, although it looks vaguely familiar. I started to get a little concerned about it because it just showed up so damn much on the bill. I trust my husband, and the poor guy doesn't have time to breathe let alone make phone calls to a floozy, but ya know how your mind kind of plays tricks on you? I think in my mind it's April fools day every day. I think I literally said out loud to myself while on the computer, 'whose number is this, dammit?'. So I Google it, like any self respecting paranoid crazy woman would do. Wouldn't you know it, the number was familiar because it was OUR phone number. I embarrassed myself in front of myself. It's definitely time for me to get a job outside the house.

I also know I have some unfinished bizness to take care of, there is a tag and a tag/award that I am going to get to, I've been real busy being insane....

Monday, August 25, 2008


So did you all think I went and ran off with Justin Timberlake? Where the heck has the summer gone? I really had a lot of plans. Some of them got done, some of them didn't. Such is life I guess but it still gives me a little grief. I feel bad about not posting here. I feel bad that I didn't do my bloggy giveaways which I had planned. The more I felt bad, the more I didn't post. So I am here to face the music so to speak and ramble on about my insanely boring life.

So our magical summer is coming to a close here. I think bubs had a great time. I had a great time making sure he had a great time. Camp turned out wonderfully. He actually wound up going without a shadow for the second half of it. That was like a dream come true, although it involved me letting go a little, which was not easy. What in my life is easy though? We are now in that purgatory that happens between camp and kindy. I am going to try and savor this week. After this week, my baby is going to be in elementary school. Whoa. Just typing that makes me think that he'll be in driver's ed before I know it.

August was nice. I had my birthday on the 9th (and I really wanted to do a giveaway and I will do a belated bday one, I just have to actually make something nice to give away). My dh got me a garmin gps system. I love it. We had borrowed my parents when we went to Pennsylvania and I really became attached to it. I think though that I will no longer pay attention to how I get anywhere which really won't help me much should the garmin stop functioning. I also think that while it's an incredibly nifty device, it has it's creepy moments, in a 'Hal-2001 A Space Odyssey' kind of way. I will put it on when I need to go somewhere new, but I take a different route starting out. When you do that she says 'recalculating' but she says it with just a hint of disappointment and disdain and it's enough for me to feel slightly guilty about veering off course. There is a way to shut the voice off, but I haven't read the instruction book yet. It also has bluetooth capabilities and an mp-3 player. It' s also forcing me to remember to lock my car all the time , which is something I never did. I have a friend who has one and she told me she keeps windex wipes in the car to wipe away the little suction cup circle you get after you pluck it off. She said thieves see it and know you have one. Hey, it's all in the name of modern convienence, right? I really do love it though, and I thought my husband did a great job! He also got me a new charm for my troll bracelet, and a nice copper watering can.

See, I told you my life was boring. We also had bubs' school graduation last Friday. It was from his center based aba school. He technically graduated in June but they had the ceremony at a local college last week. It was bittersweet to say the least. For many reasons. I think I have a form of survivors guilt from the whole experience. We have been so blessed, so incredibly fortunate. Our son has really come so far, and continues to do so well (knocking on wood). It's been such a wild ride and I know that most are not as lucky as we are. I know it and watching the kids graduate on Friday cemented that thought home. It's a chapter in our lives that will never be forgotten, but is coming to some kind of end as we move on to the next adventure. I am not sure I can actually put the whole thing into words. I am still kind of processing it myself. I couldn't even make sounds come out of my mouth as I watched bubs stroll casually up the stage and smile and wave as he collected his hard earned diploma. Choked up doesn't even come close. It was the culmination of 3 years of red alert terror combined with joy I never even knew I could feel, a roller coaster ride of emotions. I know I am not making sense, like I said, I am still trying to get a grip on it. We did go out and celebrate with a nice dinner and bubs' teachers came along with us.

I have decided to venture on into the working world. Yes, my life of leisure will be coming to a close as I try to add a few coins to our dusty piggy bank. I am going to start slowly. I have all my paperwork together to start subbing in our school district. I am not ready to get a full time job just yet but I think this will be a good start. The hours will be great and the pay is pretty damn good, and compared to what I have taken in over the last 5 years, amazing. My husband is fried and I have to help. Plus I really want a new couch.

So I am back-I have gotten over my blogcrastination. More boring stories to follow.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

I'm bringing crazy back...

Dreams are really crazy. Since I stopped taking my sleep aids (overt the counter since the ambien ran out) my dreams have been particularly insane. I can't even believe I am writing about this. I don't think I would even admit I had this dream in real life. Although I think that while this dream was bizarre, it did send me a message that I needed to get.

OK, so my dream was about Justin Timberlake. He is not someone I particularly find 'hot' and I am not really into his music. I don't hate him or anything, he just doesn't 'do it' for me, well at least for my conscious mind. My unconscious mind I have no control over.

In my dream, I somehow met JT (as he will be known from this point on). Don't ask me how. I don't know where my husband and child were during this time period, they existed though because they were conspicuous in their absence. So I met JT and ugh, I can't even believe I am typing this... We met and we 'connected' and we became 'friends'. Nothing dirty happened, and that was my dream decision. For some reason, JT liked me. I was totally myself in the dream. 42 years of age, borderline frump, at least 50 lbs overweight, in need of some highlights and a trim ... you get it? In spite of that JT liked me, he really liked me. We hung out. Perhaps he was in need of a mother figure, but it's way too trippy to try and analyze his motives for being in my dream. I remember being on his tour bus and deciding that I couldn't leave the fabulous life I already had to go and join JT and his merry hipsters on his way cool tour bus. I remember thinking (do we think in our dreams?) that I would miss my child (duh) and my husband. I felt guilty for being there (and for even having this stupid dream) and while I enjoyed the whole situation, I felt like I belonged in my old boring life. It really is a wonderful life... and everytime you hear 'bringing sexy back' an angel gets his wings.....So I broke poor JT's smarmy little heart. I think he'll survive.There was also a paparazzi situation but I won't even get into that.

OK, now that I have completely embarrassed myself, I am throwing out this question to my readers: Have you had questionable dreams about someone that in your waking hours kind of repulses you? Or am I alone on this one? I won't even begin to tell you about the eminem dreams I have had (more than once,lol).

OK, this post might get deleted at any time due to my mortification.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Digging in the dirt...

What a difference a day makes. Today my dad called us up and said he was going to be working near us and said we should stop by with bubs so he could run the machine. I guess I didn't take it literally, I thought he would get to sit in it for a while and then we would go. Little did I know he would actually pull levers and lift buckets and scoop out dirt and dump the dirt. It was unbelievable (and probably not that safe, I promise I do make him wear a helmet when he rides his bike, and I cut up hot dogs into microscopic pieces). My dad said he was really good at it. I never really focused on hand eye coordination, I guess I never obsessed over it much for some reason. I do know that the fact that he was able to listen to directions, focus and actually get that machine to work was monumental.

It was also really nice for my dad. I know he gets a huge kick out of it. Being that he had only girls, and we didn't go into the family business, it's a lot of fun for him to share his experiences with his grandsons (and he has only grandsons, 3 of them). He used to have his own fleet of these machines before he retired, but bubs wasn't even born yet before most of the stuff was sold. Bubs had a great time with it, and my dad even paid him 5 dollars for his hard work.

My husband is home this week, he hurt his calf on his yearly 'caveman' camping trip. He was bummed, but it's nice to have him home. We have been having quality time and I have been getting a little 'me' time. Today he took bubs out on some errands and I got to completely purge the living room. It was delightful. I feel all fresh and clean inside, perhaps what I imagine a colonic to feel like (although that's not for me). I organized, sorted, and binned things. I threw out some junk, and shoved the rest into the pit of hell we call our basement. Then I even got to go to my sewing room and make my five minute skirt . That's what it's called and if my computer wasn't so screwed up I would post the link. It took a little longer than five minutes, and it might make me look like I am converting to Orthodox Judaism, but I really like it. Plus it just felt good to have the sewing machine running.

My sister had the same situation happening with her home owner's insurance and we might have found a nice company that doesn't care about our trampolines. The nice lady from the nice insurance company is going to check and hopefully call me tomorrow with her good news (see, I am optimistic again).

edited to add the link for the 'five minute skirt'

Monday, August 4, 2008

I am annoying

Ugh. I am feeling so overwhelmed. This will be a boring whiny post. I am sorry in advance. No one in my 'real life' wants to hear my sorry ass whining, so unfortunately (for anyone who decides to read this) I have been forced to take it to the blog.

Reasons I am in a stinky mood:

1) I have an escrow shortage. I am not even sure I know what that is, other than it sucks, because I have to pay even more money to live in this shack. I always think of escarole and beans when I see that word. It's not a pretty dish, and it smells.

2) On the same day I was informed of my escarole shortage, I was also informed that my homeowners insurance policy was dropped due to the deathtrap in my backyard, otherwise known as a trampoline. Honestly, why do they sell those suckers if they are so toxic. Somebody must want to insure me. I was already dropped once before due to living too close to the water and being a hurricane risk (I am not that close to the water). I think I was more insulted than anything. I now have a month to try and humbly beg some dumb insurance company to please please please sell me their insurance. Plus I get to lay out a whole new years worth of insurance, while I wait for my refund from the stupid old company.

3) I am being buried alive by imaginext dinosaurs. I have a love/hate relationship with these beasts. I love them solely for the fact that they bring my child such joy, albeit a not really functional, kind of obsessive joy, but joy none the less. But I hate them because they are impossible to gain control over. They are strange sizes, they make noise, and they are freakin everywhere. I have recognized the fact that clutter is really detrimental to my health. I have also recognized that it's particularly bad at Christmas and birthday time. So I am really trying to convince myself it's just temporary. I also get incredibly tired just looking at the pile of crap in my living area. The closets all need to be cleaned out, old toys need to be bagged up and donated (and snuck out of the house while my child and my husband is not around) and the rest of the crap needs to have homes. I can't do anything till I get this done, and for some reason, I just cannot seem to get it done. It's self loathing at it's best here.

4) I am feeling smothered. By plastic dinosaurs, and my in laws.

waaahhhh, ricky....(in my best I love lucy voice)

Deep down I know that these are stupid reasons to be upset. Really stupid reasons. I think honestly , I am just having some kind of summer meltdown. My motherboard is fried, and I think I should just go and get a spa pedicure and quit my whining. Either that or a three day nap. Yeah, that would be nice.

Saturday, August 2, 2008

The dingo ate my blog

OK, last night I tried to log on to my blog and I kept getting a message that Internet explorer could not open it. "Operation Aborted", which I always find to be such a lovely saying. I was convinced someone hacked into my blog. There goes my troubled mind again. I must have some great sense of self to think that anyone would take the time to hack into my blog.

So now that I am back to reality and I did a little digging, I found out that it's a site meter problem. So I deleted the site meter, but I did save the code. I really miss my site meter. I found it really entertaining. The other day, someone googled 'pitchers of girls with bubs' and found their way to my humble abode. Boy were they disappointed. Most of the time I just see my location on there.

At any rate, I am back in business and I can breathe a sigh of relief.